Trying To Keep You For Myself

NYE, 2008?

I watch you struggle, helpless sugar-coating your reality with laughter trying to keep you for myself. You tell me the news from the ICU as I watch a muted documentary on Highgrove, A royal garden visited in my darkest days. I am shocked by how selfish I am trying to keep you for myself. You mention Buddha and I try to laser beam the loogie inside your head with the white-hot light of my third eye, with my heart, my love trying to keep you for myselfI want you to have the freedom to allow what comes to come. I want to tell you to fight, to embrace life, to not give up trying to keep you for myself. You are my sister, my best friend and I don't know how to make you better, comfort you, hold you in your fear when all I want to do is keep you for myself.